hooray for an end to somewhat depressing posts. for now anyway. that never seems to last too terribly long with me. i digress. i won’t be so presumptuous as to say something like “sorry i haven’t written in a while.” mostly because i’m not sorry at all. for about a month and a half there i was actually busy. me and amanda moved out of our crappy apartment and into gerard’s house. those of you in riverside know exactly what i’m talking about. so yeah, exciting stuff.
but on to what i’ve decided to write about today. ladies and gentlemen, i’d like to present you with what i believe to be the most useless invention in the long horrible history of useless inventions. i give you….the AUTOMATIC PAPER TOWEL DISPENSER!!!!
!!!!!!!!!
these things have been an overnight sensation it feels like. they’re absolutely everywhere and i just don’t get these stupid things. how lazy are we? “no! i cannot and will not be bothered to pull a lever–who knows how many times?– in order to receive the appropriate amount of paper towels to dry my hands! if only someone made something that would electronically give me paper towels one at a time.” it’s not like this is more sanitary or something. people don’t ordinarily get paper towels if they haven’t just washed their hands. and it seems like this is the worst possible environmental solution ever. it’s cutting down trees AND using electricity. not to mention that it does horrible at actually drying your hands. it’s always a guessing game to figure out how those sensors work and by the time that second towel is done rolling out your hands are almost dry just from being out in the open. and you know that it’s going to get worse down the road. i can just see it. you happen to have to use a public restroom for a twosie, reach to the right to grab some toilet paper and discover you have to wave your hand under a machine and wait just so you can wipe. not cool, sanitation companies. not cool
